bebe

Babies are on the mind but not in the belly.

My baby friends (friends with babies) say that a baby is supposed to fit into YOUR life and not the other way around. And I think this is absolutely sound. If my baby ever wants to listen to "Baby Shark," then I will promptly say, "only those who have working uteruses can touch the AUX cord. So, indie crap it is."

Aw, the power. I thought marriage was more of a "Best Friends Forever" concept, where my husband literally follows me around and listens to EVERY word I say....AND responds with great detail and insight. 

This has not been the case.

Stephen wanted to surprise me with a hamster a few years ago for my birthday. I like small things, but have you ever smelt a hamster? A guinea pig is at least chubbier. We thought dog for a while, but they don't verbally LOL when I speak to them with my hilarious humor. 

I want a buddy, a grocery store companion, a child who laughs when I accidentally toot, and maybe one of those babies that screams and holds onto your leg when you leave the babysitter. You never feel worse about yourself than when a child horrifically screams when they realize they have to hang out with you for two hours. PAYBACK TIME, UNIVERSE. Sorry, all 12-year-olds.

And because I can't write on here without making lists.

A list:

Selfish reasons to have a baby:
- I fidget in Sacrament mtg, and I need a better distraction than signing random letters to Stephen and having him shoo me away.

- Now other drivers who stare at me while I talk out loud will see that I have a car seat in the back and therefore talking to my baby rather than myself.

I'll update with new findings.